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Conversations with a Toddler: The Bedtime Horror Picture Show

January 13, 2016 by michelle 2 Comments

Tonight as the Darling Wee Lass was winding down to go to sleep (read: hopping about the bed like those five little monkeys we’re always singing about), she crawled up on top of me so that we were tummy to tummy, her precious dollbaby face just inches from mine.

She proceeded to poke at the parts of my face, identifying correctly as she went: nose, mouf, eye, eyebows (no “r” needed), hair, ears.

Oh, she was so satisfied with herself and her facial identification prowess, bless her insomniac soul!

Huge smiles were exchanged, perhaps even a happy sigh. Treasure every moment, parents!

Then this:

M: * puts hands flat on my cheeks and presses * “No take Mommy’s head off!”

Me: * narrows eyes * “Um, nooo. . . .”

M: * pats my cheeks softly and smiles * “Head stays here.”

Me: “Preferably, yes.”

M: “HUG!” * buries head in my chest and squeezes *

This routine played out approximately fifteen to twenty times before she eventually rolled over and drifted off to wherever it is that enables her twisted toddler mind.

The Not-Horrifying-At-All Teddy Bear USB Drive

The Not-Horrifying-At-All Teddy Bear USB Drive

Sweet dreams, Mommy. Sweet dreams.

 

 

Filed Under: sleeping Tagged With: creepy toddlers, toddler sleep

Comments

  1. Judith says

    January 13, 2016 at 9:29 pm

    Then you’re good until she changes her mind.

    Reply
  2. ~k says

    June 5, 2016 at 10:22 pm

    I am with Judith, ETA in, oh, say about 15 years…

    Reply

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